aku kadang ga mau tidur cuma buat emailan sama kamu

kamu tau untuk komunikasi sama kamu aja susah setengah mati

pengen rasanya ada waktu special just you and me

tapi kayanya kamu ga pernah berharap begitu ya ?

oke aku mengerti

well, dont cry

mungkin ini yang namanya menyerah

pasrah, walau terasa sakit untuk berhenti berharap

tapi harga diri lebih tinggi dari segalanya, melebihi apapun termasuk dia

no more keep try to him !

apa yang harus diperjuangkan dari dia

muka? nggak. harta?nggak. baik?kalo dia baik pasti dia ngehargain gue dari kapan tau. lust?iya biasalah orang luar

apalagi coba yang gue harapkan dari dia?
toh dia juga tidak mengharapkan gue ada di samping dia

harga diri men !

lo ngejar2 orang yang jelas2 nyuekin lo, yang jelas2 ke lo kalo ada maunya kalo ada maksud tertentu

yang mungkin sekarang dia nganggep lo cewe gampangan yang masih ngejar2 dia walaupun udah bener2 dicuekin

lo tu cuma dikasihanin aja sama dia!

buktinya, dia cuma bales sms lo singkat dan seadanya, ga ada perhatiin lo, ga ada tanda kalo dia mengistimewakan lo

yang ada lo cuma pelampiasan, cuma buat seneng2 aja. lo tau lo selalu di nomor duakan padahal dia ga lagi sibuk apa2, bales email lama,

i hate what u've done to me !!  

DIA GA NGEHARGAI LO SAMA SEKALI !!

jadi buat apa lo cape2 berusaha untuk tetap sama dia

sometimes you have to forget all of ur feels and get what you deserve

ga usah ingat masa lalu

lo hidup buat ,asa depan bukan buat masa lalu

dia aja ga peduli sama lo

kalo dia emang beneran serius sama lo ya dia harus buktiin dan ga ngebiarin lo menderita kaya gini

COWO MACAM APA DIA !!!!?

maaf , tetapi aku tidak bisa menyerah walau otak sudah beberapa kali memerintahkan 
karena dengan harapan aku hidup dengan harapan aku berusaha

well, dont cry

I was almost desperate even i do not want to be

Tell Only You

It's been so long, baby
So many hours, so many days
It's been so long, baby
So many hours, so many days
I have these words in my heart

that I would still like to say to you

Sarang hae yo
Sarang hae yo

Standing on a lonely stage
The spotlight elongating my shadow
The music repeats our shared sadness
Everytime I sing in a concert
I cannot just forget that you won't be there tomorrow
In my heart, we'll never be apart
In my heart, we'll never be apart

Residues of the fragrance left on my hand reminds me
The promise I left in the digital camera
Every fast-transmitted photograph will tell you

Sarang hae yo means "I love you"

It represents how I cannot leave you, every minute, every second, every sound

Only your acting coy will make me smile
Sarang hae yo 只對你說
Sarang he yo, I will tell only you
I will love you, and forevermore
I will love you, and forevermore baby, you will see
I promise, baby, you will see
Every part of me belongs to you

Residues of the fragrance left on my hand reminds me
The promise I left in the digital camera
Every fast-transmitted photograph will tell you

Sarang hae yo means "I love you"

It represents how I cannot leave you, every minute, every second, every sound
Only your acting coy will make me smile
Sarang hae yo
Sarang he yo, I will tell only you
I will love you, and forevermore
I will love you, and forevermore baby, you will see
I promise, baby, you will see
Every part of me belongs to you

Sarang hae yo means "I love you"

It represents how I cannot leave you, every minute, every second, every sound

Only your acting coy will make me smile
Sarang he yo, I will tell only you
I will love you, and forevermore
I will love you, and forevermore baby, you will see
I promise, baby, you will see
Every part of me belongs to you

Oh, baby, I will love you because I belong to you

it will gonna be forever, YOU and ME

you know, it's me and him

amen

I love you but it's not so easy to make you here with me
I wanna touch and hold you forever
But you're still in my dream
And I can't stand to wait ‘till nite is coming to my life
But I still have a time to break a silence
When you love someone
Just be brave to say that you want him to be with you
When you hold your love
Don't ever let it go
Or you will loose your chance
To make your dreams come true...

I used to hide and watch you from a distance and i knew you realized
I was looking for a time to get closer at least to say... “hello”
And I can't stand to wait your love is coming to my life
When you love someone
Just be brave to say that you want him to be with you
When you hold your love
Don't ever let it go
Or you will loose your chance
To make your dreams come true...

And I never thought that I'm so strong
I stuck on you and wait so long
But when love comes it can't be wrong
Don't ever give up just try and try to get what you want
Cause love will find the way....
When you love someone
Just be brave to say that you want him to be with you
When you hold your love
Don't ever let it go
Or you will loose your chance
To make your dreams come true...

endah n resa - when you love someone

this is when the first time i saw him

then he stole my heart

and never give it back

even we're nothing now

i do i do i do love him so much even he never realize

im tired of you

really

im tired, sekine kenta

he likes it sooo much ♥
orange and orange
me, i love everything sweet :)

i really love color , i love them so much <3

hey, they're orange and pink, that's mean me and .....

aw aw aw LOL ƪ(♥-̮♥)ʃ

1 month 31 days left. Please be kind to me

  

#DecemberWish#      

My organization, my commitee, my life, my love, my laugh, my lecture.

 everything gonna be okay.

why cant i really hate you huh ? i hate you really -____- Hobby bikin gue marah bales email lama bikin kesel terus suka jayus cuek ga sensitive sama gue tukang bikin gue nangis . Hey boy u know ? i HATE you ! i HATE you !!

wherever you are

whoever you are

why i still in love with you ?

why always i can smile however you get me angry

hey you, susuk apa yang kamu pake ?

i love you

entah apa yang selalu ngebuat gue selalu falling in you ;)

hey hey i hate you  :p

el-o-vi-e

im not fine as i said

can you ?

break or not ?

dont you see dont you understand ??!!

i need you i really need you

 

the last point, he never say that even i say i hate him
what the sign of that huh ?
and the second point ? NEVER ha-ha-ha ​(¬(••)¬)

“ I’m tired and need your support, are you willing to? Cause sometimes tears do not enough “

"I hate it when people change. Well, actually I hate it when you change"

too much FEAR to say

i love you

my sekine kenta

i miss you badly
no,i mean i miss US

love and hate is so different. but sometimes it just like similar to feel. standing by side, difficult to distinguish

“

—	you know what i mean ? hate to know that actually, i missing you, mr.sekine“

aku mau bilang sesuatu ke kamu

i can not be with you

but it's hard to say

im so sorry

tapi terlalu sulit untuk dijalani

just you (˘̩̩̩^˘̩̩̩)

you know, im hurt, kenapa lo ga bereaksi apa2  saat gue bersama dengan pria lain ?
hei sebenernya apa yang ada di pikiran lo nyet ???!
im sick of you (¬_¬")

kenapa kamu ga bisa sweet kaya merekaaaaa??

sumpah kadang gue iri

ngeliat pasangan yang bisa so sweet romantic kaya gitu

ngeliat wall to wall mereka yang kayanya penuh perhatian

ngedenger mereka saling bilang kata sayang setiap hari

kalo gue ?

kayanya selama bersama dia it would be an impossible thing

gue sudah berusaha untuk mengerti

tapi gue masih bisa belum menerima

kenapa dia tidak bisa semanis pasangan pria terhadap wanitanya

i knew he loves me

tapi gue butuh sesuatu yang lebih dari sekedar i have already know

apa mungkin gue harus bersabar dan bertahan lagi??

tapi sampe kapan ?

gue sudah lelah terlalu berharap banyak sama dia

sampai sekarang gue mati harapan

gue pengen udahan

tapi apa itu solusi terbaik ?

my soul was cry (¯―¯٥)

dan menunggu email saya di balas oleh anda itu sungguh amat sangat menyiksa

jadi jangan salahkan saya jika saya pun demikian dengan anda

saya bosan bertengkar selalu karena masalah sepele seperti ini 

tolong hargai saya
jujur saya tidak tahu apakah anda menganggap saya ini ada atau tidak :'(

what's then ?

apa lo ngerasain yang gue rasain ?

haha gue ga bisa nangis, tapi hati gue nangis ga berhenti2

apa iya ini yang lo pengen

broke up then what ?

jujur gue gamau

tapi terlalu banyak sakit ken

sampe gue gatau harus ngapain lagi

someone ask to me :

va, d fe msh byk penggemar lo g?

dngr2 lo dipuja2 kaum adam

jgn ge er y?

wkwkwkw

asal kamu tau

aku ga butuh seribu orang fans

aku ga butuh mereka

yang aku butuhin cuma kamu

kamu yang care sama aku

tapi kenapa kamu tidak seperti mereka, yang jelas2 aku ignore?

aku cuma butuh kamu yang perhatian sama aku, sekine kenta :'(

we have our BLOG

yeay !!

[12:24:33 AM] ケンえもん: eh besok jangan berbahaya2 yaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
[12:24:45 AM] ケンえもん: kamu nya harus amam...
[12:24:59 AM] ケンえもん: pas pake umum...
[12:25:08 AM] ケンえもん: aman
[12:25:28 AM] aviva amalia: aku pake baju astronout aja biar aman
[12:25:55 AM] aviva amalia: semuanya katutupan jadi gada yang bisa liat
[12:26:10 AM] aviva amalia: ditabrak pun masih tahan
[12:26:17 AM] aviva amalia: |-)
[12:26:23 AM] aviva amalia: zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz
[12:26:45 AM] aviva amalia: *garing
[12:27:27 AM] ケンえもん: astronout?
[12:27:44 AM] ケンえもん: kamu astronaut y?
[12:27:53 AM] aviva amalia: iya
[12:28:09 AM] ケンえもん: terbang k space?
[12:28:26 AM] aviva amalia: iya
[12:28:33 AM] aviva amalia: mau cari pangeran di bulan
[12:30:07 AM] ケンえもん: nitip salam y untuk pangeran:)
[12:30:39 AM] aviva amalia: ga boleh pangerannya buat aku doang
[12:31:48 AM] aviva amalia: the one for me
[12:32:46 AM] ケンえもん: Im the one for you sayang

[lagilagi speechless]

ngambek

[17-Aug-2010 11:21:17 PM] *** Missed call from ケンえもん. ***
[17-Aug-2010 11:22:48 PM] aviva amalia: apa ?
[17-Aug-2010 11:23:25 PM] ケンえもん: g ada apa2..
[17-Aug-2010 11:23:40 PM] aviva amalia: yauda
[17-Aug-2010 11:24:26 PM] ケンえもん: cuma mau ngomong aja..
[17-Aug-2010 11:24:40 PM] aviva amalia: yaudaaaaa
[17-Aug-2010 11:30:03 PM] ケンえもん: cuman aku  mau ngomong I love u..
[17-Aug-2010 11:35:57 PM] aviva amalia: thank you

[speechless] (Ơ̴̴̴̴̴̴͡.̮Ơ̴̴͡)

and finally you not even reply to my vocation : '(

 I cannot stand being awake, the pain is too much

Do you really love me ?
Should I keep waiting for you ?
sorry, im not sure  (-̩̩̩-͡ ̗̊--̩̩̩͡)

please answer my pray yaa ALLAH :)

show time

i've been doing my best

tinggal menunggu hasilnya

tuhaaaan tolong akuuuu semoga lolos 

aamiin

bismillahirrohmanirrohiim ya ALLAH

semoga ini langkah awal dalam mencapai cita-cita aku :)

aamiin

new beginning

in every ending has a new beginning
so did my life
tomorrow is just the beginning, only a small step of my efforts to achieve my dreams
give you a blessing and a miracle to me so that everything can run smoothly according to what I wanted to achieve my future
in order to pursue my dream
give me confidence so everything goes successfully perfectly
grant me GOD

yaa ALLAH yaa rahmaan yaa rahiim:))

aku mempunyai cinta

namun aku sadar cinta ini tidak bisa aku simpan sendiri

aku akan menitipkan cinta ini, kepada Sang Maha Pemberi Cinta

aku tidak ingin pusing

tidak ingin lagi ada kekhawatiran dan ketidakpercayaan dalam hati

biar Dia yang menjaga cinta ini

agar dia tetap menjaga cinta ini di jalan yang lurus

cinta yang tulus karena dia yang meberi cinta ini di hati kami masing-masing

sekarang aku ikhlas, semua ada jalannya, semua indah pada waktunya

:)

semoga dengan ini aku bisa menjadi gadis yang lebih dewasa

because I believe women are the best of the best only for the best men too

for that I am (was) trying to improve myselves

become a better person to get the best

and I hope he is there, too, thought the same with me

so when we meet and come together again we've become a better person

aamiiin:)

Happy Ramadhan :)

-vivaamalia-

praying

I never felt as clam as this, after he left to go

    no more worries

    no more fears

    no more crying

I am submitting to ALLAH
surrender everything to the gods, including this relationship
thanks god

all i can do is only trying and praying
pray the best for me and him

pray that this relationship will never end
and I believe that god has his own way to realize my prayer
whatever it is, it is definitely the best

hopefully this is our learning to become better, to then be reunited into a better person
and I want to love him because ALLAH 
who give love in our hearts
who will keep this embers of love in our hearts each other

i love ALLAH
and i love kenta because of him

I sometimes miss my old style of dating I used to live,
di-sms, got a call every day even when I went to bed just to say good night to me, if I wanted to go just waiting for the transfer pick-up and I'm just sitting pretty in the car, no longer waiting for some one -who became my boyfriend- call or send an sms because he would have shall first do it, no more fear in a relationship.

but the real reason why i keep silence are, I'm honestly scared of this relationship. too dear so that scares me. too much fear, because he only really has taken my heart, I never felt a feeling so deep like this, even though he was far different from what i missed as i wrote earlier

I fear my heart have provided will be wasted.
I expect him too much, and I fear that hope is false hope.

I was afraid because I was too dear to him 

I fear that this will be futile 

because I had a promise to myself that I'm not going to fall in love, except to my husband, but I'm breaking a promise myself by falling in love with him, which I do not know how serious you are. or it just no sense ?

-vivaamalia- 

feel it

Piglet : “how do you spell love?”

Pooh : “you don’t spell it, you must feel it”

Have you already feel it  honey?

-vivaamalia-

survive

vivakeken :)

Holding on is tough

much together than letting go
but this never be simply quitting here
thought i should let you know
 

i miss you, my sekine kenta

 

-vivaamalia-